Can this be a silent Thankful Friday? It's not that I don't have things to be thankful for. That's silly. Just sitting here breathing is enough to rejoice over. No..I'm certainly grateful for many things. It's just that those things are hard to put into words today. There have been many times this week where I have felt all of the words rolling around this noggin yet unable to pull any of them out in a coherent order. The words are a mix of happy, sad, angst, and funny. The problem is that they're all swirling around together and I have been unable to yank out the happy, funny for fear of dragging some of the sad along with it. I'm tired of writing sad. I'm tired of writing about missing. I'm tired of writing of things lost. I'm kind of just tired.
Fall temperatures have creeped in triggering my inner hibernation hermit. Suddenly I have noticed my lack of leg warmers and how much I may desperately need to add some to my life. We ate our first batch of chili on Monday with cornbread and last night, Michael stood at my bedside to say goodnight and shook his head at me I shivered under my measly two top layers of a sheet and comforter. He swooped down and retrieved his grandmother's quilt from under the bed and threw it over me. Meanwhile, he turns the air conditioner up to the highest (lowest?) setting in his room. He sleeps in the refrigerator. I am torn between fluffy sweaters and shoes without socks. I think that as soon as I pull out the warmer clothes or put away the flip flops, those warm summer temperatures will come back. Maybe I should trick Mother Nature by pretending to put those things away.
But, I remind myself, Fall is beautiful here. The leaves turn to golds and reds that dazzle the eyes for months. It is the season for bonfires and cider and moons bigger and brighter than can be imagined. It is the spell binding season where I'm tempted to smudge the house with sage and burn some candles. So instead of heading into this season begrudgingly, I should be grateful for the beautiful changes to come. In honor of this, I've put butternut squash on the menu for next week and we've started talking about Thanksgiving food. I've started thinking about a pumpkin carving party (Tiffany, remember when we used to do those at your place?). Fall is the season for being grateful for the bounty of food harvested. It is the grateful season and I am ready to open my heart to it.
I am thankful for my family. I am thankful for the rain. I am really thankful for the return I've made to my yoga mat. There was a moment after class the other day where I was tempted to roll myself up in my yoga mat hug, I'd missed my mat so. I am thankful for warm bowls of chili and calico quilts from grandmas. I am, as always, thankful for you. Here's to a productive weekend, but a truly Thankful Friday.