contact Me

Need to ask me something or get in contact with me? Just fill out this form.

Kansas City MO 64131






Cindy Maddera


This may not be a post for all eyes. For instance if you're my brother, you're probably not going to want to read this. If you continue on, well, don't say I didn't warn you. There was a guy I went out with a couple of times. He was nice, not unattractive. On our first date he kept looking at me weird, like he couldn't quite figure me out, but he asked me out again for the following week. The day of what was supposed to be our second date, he sent a text saying that he had to cancel. Something about a busy week and things with friends and family he had to think over. I figured this meant that he was just not that into me and didn't expect to hear back from him. But I did and we went on a second date and it was fine. Notice the use of the word "fine". There came a point near the end of the evening when I started thinking to myself "how do I get rid of this guy?". It's not that I wasn't having a good time or he made me feel uncomfortable. I was just ready for the date to be over. And then the guy kissed me.

The kiss was not a bad kiss. It was not a huge cavernous mouth of a kiss. I did not feel like he was going to swallow me whole. It was not the kind of kiss that felt intrusive or slobbery. It was a perfectly nice kiss. I just felt nothing. Nada. Nothing. Not even a zing or a zip or spark. And I knew right there and then that I would not being seeing this guy again. Because you see, I know what I want from a kiss. I want the kind of kiss that makes me want more. I want a kiss to set my whole body on fire starting from the tips of my toes all the way up to top of my head. I want the kind of kiss that sets off a chain reaction where clothes become haphazardly clutched or even tossed to the way side, the kind that makes you forget how you made it from one room to the next without tripping and falling over your own feet. And because I know I want this, I know better than to settle for less.

Maybe that's the benefit of being so inexperienced. I can count on one hand the number of people I have kissed in a passionate on the lips kind of way. Also inexperienced may not be the best word to describe it. Though I may be lacking in number of conquests, I am not lacking in certain skills or know how. I know the difference between fine and really amazing. Now if I only understood weather, I really would be worthy of superhero status.